Is this legal, illegal, or just fucked up?

“American Airlines, can I help you?

“Hello, this is Allahu Akbar al Jihadi. There is no bomb aboard Flight 2257 from Paris. Repeat–no bomb.”

“No bomb?”

“No. None. You can relax. And on Flight 4141 from Miami–those guys are not hijackers.”

“Not hijackers?”

“No, they’re day laborers. The hijackers got scared on the way to the airport and hired them instead. Unfortunately, they’re quite harmless… But whatever you do, for God’s sake don’t let them drink too much. Tell them you’re flying over a dry county when they ask for seconds.”

“Ok…anything else?”

“Yeah, could I get a one-way to Isantbul tomorrow?”