• What’s the deal with tits?

• A National Wet-Nurse Corps would have solved this.

• Instead, Biden’s using the National Defense Production Act to commandeer your white nipples.

(Yes, them!)

• They were born too soon, said everyone convicted of deliberately killing their babies prior to this crisis.

• Give me monopolistic capitalism or give me famished infants!

• What about bleach?

• Kids are too spoiled nowadays anyway.

• When I was a kid we had formula—shut the hell up and stop your crying was the formula. We had plenty.

• It’s punishment for our sins. Those kids were mean. And God hates fags—none of those babies had any interest in the opposite sex.

• Cityfolk got so many issues…

• You may be against immigration but there are a lot of lactating foreigners out there.

• But seriously, whats the deal with tits? What’s the failure rate on a mammary gland anyway? Isn’t there also a back-up unit? (I think there is…) And what’s the Gross National Shortfall of breast milk and how can we best extract that tonnage?