I used to think newswomen were the sexiest (see February 6th post below–The Last Wholesome Perversion: NILF Leching).
But not anymore. The libidinous reign of the NILFs is ending.
The new sexiest cultural position has got to be the Female Paranormal Investigator (PILFs).
I just love it when they walk around in the dark in infrared-invisible white shirts looking for EVPs–ectoplasmic virtual penetrations or something.
These are like NILFs from beyond the grave–no way a normal newswoman could compete with those sexy credentials!
My favorite episode is the one in the Haunted Hooters restaurant from Daytona Beach. Mysterious nipple-hardening breezes keep wafting down from out-of-control air-conditioning ducts. And it’s all caught on tape!
The Haunted Sorority House Slumber Party is another great episode–especially the part where Kris Williams gets a scalp-full of ecto-jizz wearing a re-enactment nightie.
Or when Jael de Pardo got goosed by the Shadow Figure in some weird tropical ruins where heat and humidity preclude all modesty.
Face it, it’s comforting to know that there’s something beyond the grave, and that even when you’re dead hot women still might wanna talk to you even though you are definitely creepy by that point if you weren’t already.
NILF-appeal, as discussed in February (see below), is the pleasing incongruity of important current information delivered with visual hotness. But PILF-appeal is the further incongruity of philosophically-significant information delivered via hotness.
In the dark.
Alan Brech 2012