Television Begins its Campaign Against the Internet

(redundant text for google)
From Television to its Long-Lost Viewers: Come back, hither, away from that fucking internet!
Barbara Eden for TV: “See you can’t get this kind of shit on the internet, and even if you could, it wouldn’t make sense without a lot of TV!”
Old fashioned bitch-slap scene: “Get your ass back in front of the TV” (spoken by the Powers that be)
Barbara Eden (as the American public): “I can’t take the ads and the lack of actual sex anymore!”
America, we’ve heard your input so we’re bringing back bitch-slaps to television!

(c)2012, Alan Brech


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